1st day of college...1988...
Tom had met a girlfriend of mine at a Get-To-Know-You type dance and they had hit it off. I walked into the HUB (Hawk Union Building) and they were sitting together with an assortment of some other friends of mine and his. A. was sitting next to Tom, with a sort of smug "look I already have a potential boyfriend" happy look on her face, you know that look girls get, and Tom was sitting there with a sort of "how long do I have to sit here being shown off like a new car before I can get away" look on his face. Needless to say, things didn't progress very far between the two of them.
Unfortunately for the both of them, (well for A., hopefully Tom now has a bit more charitable view of the situation) with a desperation that only wanting to have a group of guys to hang out with when you know very few people -- and vice versus for Tom's friends, once we had all met each other "the group" was formed. Tom spent the next semester trying his best to be just offensive enough to break the group up.
I wasn't much impressed with him.
And I don't think he even knew I was a different person from any of the other 3 or 4 "A. friends" as he had us classified in his head. Although I did think, I suppose, he could be pretty funny...when he wasn't being downright rude.
I suppose that could have been it, if it wasn't for a new peechee. Yes, we owe so much to new school supplies. Next semester, Tom brings in a new peechee, which he declares looks too perfect and tidy. He invites us all to write our favorite band names on it. I wrote "Depeche Mode". (Thanks Steph, by the way, for introducing me to Depeche Mode...) A little while goes by and he starts practically yelling, "Who wrote Depeche MODE!??!" I thought he was angry about it and he hated the group. Turns out he loved them, much more than I did actually, but he didn't know anyone who liked them as well. He was desperate for anyone who wasn't interested in Heavy Metal Hair bands or Sir Mix Alot. So for the few months all he wanted to talk about was music. I actually remember telling him, "You know I can converse on a wide variety of subjects, politics, art, movies, sports..." He laughed, as I recalled, and returned immediately to music. ::sigh::
Eventually we actually started against all odds becoming fairly good friends by the end of the year and I called him up one day and asked him if he'd like to go see "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" with me. This was not something I really looked at as a date. But somewhere that evening it dawned on me that "This is a date!"
Small side note: I had just broken up with a guy I'd thought was maybe going to be *the guy.* A guy I'd known since I was 11 and had been almost dating on several points but didn't actually date until that year...it lasted about 3 weeks, maybe 2 weeks come to think of it... R. sort of thought of himself as a stand-up comedian, he actually worked at a couple of clubs once or twice. He had a routine worked up and everything. He had this one really stupid joke he would tell, "How do you catch a unique rabbit? You 'neak up on him." In sort of I know this is stupid but isn't it funny anyway.
So Tom and I are having a nice time, but I'm thinking, he's too much like R. He has almost the same sense of humor. And then just in that moment Tom tells the "unique rabbit" joke. I completely froze. He thought I was just thinking what kind of idiot would tell such a dumb joke, he started backpedaling, "It's just a dumb joke of my mom's..." And I'm thinking "He IS R.!!! I have to get out of here!" And so nothing happens between us over the summer.
The next school year I went to that same dance he'd gone to last year with a completely different group of friends. And he saw me dancing with them. And he ran over and danced with us (me) the rest of the night. And he kept doing that at dances, and yet, nothing's happening, well except for once getting sort of jealous and annoyed that he showed up and I was dancing with someone else once. By this point I had gotten over the whole R. thing, realized he was only a bit like R. anyway, and was getting a little impatient with him. He was worried he'd lose a good friend if he pursued a deeper relationship. And I'm thinking, I'm so dropping you if you don't kiss me soon, lol.
Finally, I had tickets to see Peter Pan, I was going to go with my friend Kat. The day of, I very incredibly rudely asked her if I could take Tom. I promised her up and down that if nothing happened tonight I would never mention Tom's name again. That was it, I was going to give him One.Last.Chance! I swear! She very graciously and since I think she was sick of me talking her ear off about a relationship that wasn't going anywhere, and yet, she was annoyed with me for blowing her off but anyway, she said OK. I called Tom, he said he'd like to go. And Kat has had to keep hearing about him ever since, I think she's forgiven me...at least I hope so!
So how did you meet your honi?
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